Dr. Randy Carlson


Divorce isn’t the unpardonable sin. If your marriage has ended in divorce, your life isn’t over. God promises, If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness (1 John 1:9). You’re not an outcast with God. He doesn’t hate you or your ex-spouse. Through forgiveness and reconciliation with God, a bright future and a healthy life are possible.

He does, however, often allow His children to experience the consequences of divorce. It’s been my observation that those who remain intentional with a strong faith, positive resolve and a solid support system seem to do the best when living through those consequences.

As a divorced Christian, there are five things to be intentional in as you move toward emotional and relational healing:

  1. Confession—Confess any sin to God first, and then go to those you have either hurt or disappointed and ask for their forgiveness.
  2. Guard Your Heart—Stay out of another romantic relationship, for an extended length of time, giving your heart extra time to heal.
  3. Accountability—Enter into an accountability relationship with a mature and objective Christian of the same sex.
  4. Time—Expect the healing to take time. I’ve seen those who have experienced divorce take three to five years before they are strong enough to consider another relationship.
  5. Discipline—take care of your priorities. Don’t allow yourself to contemplate and reflect on your divorce to the point it becomes a distraction and dictates your actions. (For example, if you have children, being an intentional parent is now your number one responsibility.)

Intentional ONE THING Challenge

If you could do ONE THING and know that it would make a significant, lasting, possibly life-changing difference in your life, would you do it? Dr. Carlson shares the power of ONE THING and why you should get started doing your ONE THING today.



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