Found Your Soul Mate? Maybe...But Have You Begun Soul Mating?
1. Confront problems early
You know, I came across the idea of SoulMating several years back when Dr. John Gottman published a book on the factors that lead to strong marriage relationships. He called the couples that were most successful, "Soul Mates". Well, one of the intriguing things I found out about "Soul Mates" was that even though there was a proliferation of worldly indicators about what strengthens marriages, there was even stronger Biblical evidence about what creates strong marriages (in other words, the worldly indicators were backed by Biblical foundation!)
So, I adapted Dr. Gottman's idea and created what I like to call the 7 musts of soul mating from a biblical perspective...so that you can see how you and your marriage can improve and succeed.
Of course, since we are short on room, I won't be able to go as in-depth as I would like. However, you will get an idea of what I mean.
The 7 Musts for Soul Mating...
Ephesians 4:26 says, "Don't let the sun go down on your wrath." It's true. Couples that confront problems early will be able to address the problems early. Do not try an avoid problems.
The Bible tells us to take care of the tongue and it's power. Careful of what you speak. Research shows that couples that tend to say everything on their mind are the ones that experience the most difficulty.
3. Pick your battles carefully
Don't make every decision an argument that you have to try and win. Understand that discernment is important in relationship development.
4. Accept influence from each other
The Bible tells us that we are to be mutually submissive one to another. Submission is not a one-way street. You must understand that your spouse has areas of strength and that your relationship benefits from them.
5. Have high standards
Not having high standards for you will lead to quick marital dissatisfaction. You belong to your spouse. Give them something they are proud of. Have high standards with regards to Unthoughtfulness, Unlovingness and Unfaithfulness.
6. Know how to make up
Couples that know how to make up and not let the sun go down on their wrath are mature couples. But to be able to smooth things over and be able to make up is a step further.
7. Be positive
Encourage and show your spouse love in everything you do. God commands it when he says love your spouse as Christ loves the church. Be sure and pray with your spouse. This creates a positive bond with just you two and Christ.
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