So You Mean My Marriage Isn't Different?
Encouragement for your marriage is found when you read Ephesians 5:33 (NKJV): "Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband." In this scripture you see a clear command by God to love and respect one another in marriage. It certainly is promising. But what happens if you develop problems of respect and love in your marriage. What happens if your marriage doesn't seem to be following the exact line the Bible says it should? What do you do when things aren't-for whatever reason-following God's plan for a successful marriage? Well, the easy answer is you go out and get help. That doesn't mean you let the entire neighborhood know about your business. You also shouldn't create contention by letting your in-laws have a say in your marriage decisions. What getting help means is that whether it's a pastor, a counselor, or an objective mentor, you should seek Scripturally-based counsel in a struggling marriage. It is the only way you can overcome such close and personal problems. But, what if your ability to get help is hampered by a spouse who does not want to get outside help? The anxieties and struggles that are in a marriage will only get worse when couples deny that they need help because they want to save face or think their marriage is different than other people's marriages. You mean my marriage isn't different? That's exactly right. In fact, not only is your marriage not different, it is more similar to other marriages in God's eyes than you might think. You can't "go it alone" if things get serious... One of the biggest errors Christian couples can make is to they think their marriage is different. Add on top of that the fact that the mistake is usually a culmination of several different smaller mistakes-several different factors-all rolled into one big developing problem, and you've got a serious storm brewing. The mentality of "I got us into this problem, I can get us out" is detrimental to the most earnest attempts at fixing your problems. It's a damaging approach that will trip you up. The simple fact is that you shouldn't, you can't, go it alone if things get serious and expect to have any kind of positive lasting marriage...